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So you’re wondering how to be a happy person, or at least happier in general? Luckily, there are some things you can work on to be happier.
Happiness, as simple as the feeling is, seems like an extremely herculean task to attain nowadays. This can be attributed to the fact that the standard for happiness has been linked more to the physical than to the mental state of mind.
Happiness can be seen as the feeling that comes when an individual takes on tasks he or she loves, thus the fastest way to attain happiness is doing what you love. This becomes very tricky when you are in a situation you didn’t choose. Or perhaps a job you have no love for but you have to partake in due to factors such as the high job security.
What then can we do if we are in such a position? Well, firstly, you need to understand that your happiness is your own duty. No one was brought to this world to make us happy. Yes, you are entirely responsible for your happiness.
Based on this, love is the feeling when two individuals come together to share their happiness, not cause the other person to create happiness for them. Relationships are partnerships, not jobs. When you come to the realisation that your happiness is your duty, then you can begin to grow, seek the things that make you happy and shun the things that make you miserable.
You have the right to cut off ties with the things or people (especially the people) that make you miserable. They have no place in your life, be it a close acquaintance or even a lover. You have the right to draw the line and walk away when it is crossed.
This article describes some very useful tips on how to be a happy person. If taken seriously, you will definitely see positive changes in your life and general well-being.
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1. Let go of your past
Your past has no hold over your future. Whatever mistakes you might have made should not make you miserable right now. Maybe you made decisions you were not proud of, and that is normal. To err is human after all, right? So why then do you keep hurting yourself?
It might be very hard to forget the pain you have been put through. Or it may seem appropriate to hold a grudge against those who have wronged us in our lives, but to what end? It is very understandable that you might want to make them feel the same way they did to you. However, the thing about seeking the downfall of others is that it may be justified, yes, but it will still be poisonous to your well-being.
The malice you’re keeping will eat deep into your soul if care is not taken. What then can you do to let go of your past? Firstly, accept it. Accept that it has happened and now you need to look forward with a renewed conviction.
Another thing is to not treat others as though they are the ones who wronged you. Yes, your boyfriend was terrible, but not all males are the same! Yes, your ex-girlfriend made life very hard for you but not all women are like that. Many people actually do care about the people they love. Give yourself time to heal and forgive those who have wronged you. Most importantly, be ready to love others who come your way.
2. Be content
Whatever you have is yours, you should not feel that you deserve as much as others have or seek to get more. What you have is what you have worked for. You should understand that it will grow in time with the same amount of hard work you have been putting in.
Therefore, you don’t feel bad when things do not seem to be going as you planned. Life happens. You are an amazing person and good things will find you!
3. Optimism is key
No matter the situation you find yourself in, it is important you understand that it could be worse, so, you should always look at the bright side. Realise that what is happening now might actually be bad, but it could have been worse, way worse.
This is what is called Optimistic Realism, which is essentially accepting the reality of things while seeing the good; seeing the rainbow after every storm and not denying that there is a storm.
4. Accept criticism
Not everything someone says about your work is actually them wanting to make you look bad or make you feel like a novice at your craft. There are actually people who want to see you grow in that potential they believe you have. They want you to be that amazing person they know you can be.
When you are criticised, listen intently and be appreciative of their input. Tell them a hearty “Thank you”, then ponder on what they said. If you can change it and you actually see that it will bring nothing but positive results if you implement their suggestions, then there is nothing wrong with doing so.
This does not undermine the reality that there are very bitter souls who want to make people feel nothing but sadness. You will notice them easily from the way they pose their suggestions. Be careful of such people, and don’t let them get you down!
5. Be around those that make you happy
Another thing to note on the road to happiness is that your company is as important as the steps you take to achieve your happiness. It is very important that the company you keep has a similar goal to achieve happiness. They shouldn’t be toxic in the sense that they see problems with everything you do or say, seeing a problem with every solution you propose.
Your company must understand the things you like and do not like, and must never seek to make fun of your insecurities. Also, you should have the same disposition towards them. Life and relationships are about giving and taking, not just taking.
6. Build your relationships
Perhaps in your times of gloom, you have kept your loved ones in the dark about the very things that cause you misery. In your bid to attain happiness, it is very important to tell them about the things that disturb you.
You will see the support they will give you to be the very boost you need on your journey to happiness. Those friendships you have stowed away to fight your battles; they are the needed boosters for your journey. That is why you need to reach out to them, apologize and make amends in the areas you sucked at. There is a sense of peace you will gain when you do this—it is simply priceless.
7. Learn to take a break
You tend to burn out when you overexert yourself. You must keep in mind the limits you have, keep mental notes of the feelings you experience when you are fatigued. Let them be the alarms that will make you go and take the much needed break you need.
This is because when you are constantly pushed over your mind or body’s limits, it will be very easy to spiral into sadness (you do not want that). During working hours, when it will be difficult to step back from your duties, there are other ways you can step back. You could reduce your work rate for a brief interval by as much as 70%, with each passing moment your energy will be refilled and then you can go full speed again.
Or you could just take a bathroom break for a while, because slowing down the work pace will expand the boundaries of your limits exponentially. After a week of hard work, you deserve that spa, that party or that barbecue. You deserve the many hours of lost sleep. Don’t deny yourself of these things! It doesn’t make you any less serious with life. Taking them will make you a happy person in the long run.
8. Face your fears
There are probably several things you shiver at the thought of doing. Perhaps it could be applying for that job because you feel you are underqualified. This is very normal to feel, but you should ask yourself, what is the worst thing that could happen?
The answer will most likely be rejection, and what is life without some rejection letters here and there? You taking the risk is where your untapped bravery comes in. See it this way, you took the most important step—you attempted. That is what matters the most and you should be proud.
People who take the much needed risks are generally more happy than those who build their castles in their comfort zone. It should be said that only risk takers actually change the world and those are the types of people the world needs now. Be a risk taker. Also, never think that an opportunity is beyond you because you are too old or too young. No, try it first before you come to such a conclusion.
Remember, it truly is better to try and fail (and try again – never give up), than to look back on your life years later and regret never trying at all.
9. Never compare yourself to others
No two individuals are the same, they are born into different circumstances, different environments and lead different lives.
So it will be unfair to your mental health to constantly compare yourself to another person you feel is more successful than you. You should understand that you are not in the said individual’s life, you do not know what the person went through to get to that position and status you so admire.
You did not walk in his or her shoes and cannot know how difficult the journey was.
We as a species were made for one another, to complement our abilities. Where we are lacking, someone else will come in with their strengths and as such we are teammates in this existence. Never foes, regardless of what we are made to believe.
10. Always seek to do what you know is right
Regardless of what is happening, never bring yourself to the point where you just want to please people. Look, humans are generally insatiable. They will complain that you are not flat enough even if you laid yourself down to be stepped over. When you are faced with decisions, do not make them based on which side holds your friends. Rather, choose what you know in your heart is the right thing for YOU.
“If you always seek to please people, you are essentially giving them charge over your own happiness”.
And remember that you are responsible for your own happiness, a key factor on how to be a happy person.
11. Exercise regularly
Exercises that do not put too much strain on your body and impede your daily activities are excellent choices. Exercise will improve the circulation of blood throughout your system and keep you healthy.
Meditation, as a mental exercise, also works a lot in improving our mental health. Simply sitting still and closing your eyes while analyzing your day at night will go a long way in improving your mind.
Another activity of note is Yoga which is now becoming increasingly popular. Yoga has been proven to still our minds and improve our physical health, two areas that need to be improved if you really want to know how to be a happy person.
12. Love Thyself
Nothing is more important than the love you have for yourself regardless of what people say about you. You have to learn to love yourself unconditionally. We live in a world where we are encouraged to hide our true selves, and put on a façade. I would never encourage this as it is not healthy in any way. The flaws you think you bear, are the very things that make you complete, that make you amazing even.
When you see these flaws and you accept them, then you have already figured out a major rule on how to be a happy person. You are enough just the way you are, and you deserve all the beautiful things that come your way.
In conclusion, I wish for you to see the beauty that lies within you and not be overwhelmed by all that’s happening around you. You see, saying no misfortune shall befall us will be unrealistic. Instead, I hope that you have the strength to always pick yourself up whenever anything brings you down, to find a reason to stand up even when the world gives you a million reasons to stay down.
You might also want to read about:
- How To Live Authentically: 11 Ways To Be True To Yourself
- How To Feel Better About Yourself And Be Happier
- 14 Things You Will Regret Not Doing Sooner
- 10 Tips On How To Have An Abundance Mindset